Social media has taken over all spheres of our lives, whether we like it or not. We learn, communicate, and even fall in and out of love here. Even though social media platforms have become an indispensable part of our daily routine, sometimes, they bring more harm than good.
You may ask, “Is there any correlation between divorce and social media?” In fact, social networks may become the reason for divorce or cause problems during the marriage dissolution process. What seemed impossible a decade ago has become a harsh reality nowadays: families are falling apart because of social media platforms if not used in moderation.
Did you know that the US courts may even recognize social media content as solid evidence? What we post on our personal accounts may have real consequences these days.
So, if you have no idea about the close interconnection between social media and divorce, read this article to find out how social media platforms may lead to divorce and how to use them properly if you are going through a marriage dissolution process not to get any complications.
Why Social Media Causes Divorce?
Perhaps most of us would simply laugh if we read the news like “The couple divorced because of Facebook.” However, the latest studies are quite concerning: spouses who do not have any accounts on social media networks are 11% happier than those who regularly use them.
Indeed, it is impossible to say for sure how many relationships Facebook has ruined, but the fact that networks have a toxic influence on marriage and relationships as a whole is hard to deny. Of course, it is not only about social media if your marriage is already broken, but sometimes, it is better to prevent the problem rather than try to solve it.
If you or your spouse has been into social media networks lately, you should know the main reasons these platforms may provoke divorce:
- Jealousy
It may seem like a minor cause, but one of the partner’s interest in social media networks often becomes a reason for the couple’s disputes and fights. Moreover, it has been proved that constant conflicts based on social media addiction have resulted in controlling behavior as well as physical abuse, which, in turn, inevitably leads to a divorce.
Even though it does not mean that one of the partner’s social media activities is a direct indicator of adultery, it is still a cause of the increased level of suspicion and anxiety of the other party since they do not know what or whom their spouse engages with on these platforms. Finally, the fact that your partner prefers communicating with others via social media networks instead of spending this time with you is quite disappointing by itself.
- Lack of Quality Time
You could visit your favorite restaurant or discover a new cuisine, arrange a short trip to another city, watch some TV series, play a board game, etc. Instead, both of you are stuck in your smartphones, scrolling through TikTok trends or endless Facebook arguments. Or even worse – only one partner is so keen on social media, while the second one is desperately asking for some attention.
Social media has drastically changed our daily routine and the way we interact with each other. Unfortunately, it has become a reason partners tend to part ways, thinking that they just lost interest in each other. But the sad truth is that social media networks will not let us enjoy real life and communication with people we love. Surely, spending time on Instagram, TikTok, Twitter, or Facebook leads to divorce if the couple constantly ignores each other’s needs.
So, next time you decide to get involved in that very important Facebook argument or read an endless Twitter news feed, put your phone away and ask your spouse out!
- Unrealistic Views on the Relationships
One of the reasons why social media platforms are considered toxic is that they provoke unrealistic expectations from many aspects of life, including marriage. You have definitely seen those videos of endlessly happy and smiling couples whose life is full of traveling, romantic dates, generous gifts, and a great time with their well-behaved kids.
While some people are skeptical enough not to take this kind of content at face value, others think that something is very wrong with their marriage, which creates a myriad of problems and unnecessary quarrels. Therefore, the answer to the question “Is TikTok ruining marriages?” is quite obvious.
Remember that nobody is perfect, no matter how hard they try to convince you otherwise. So, do not let social media networks lure you into thinking that your marriage is broken or problematic. All people have their ups and downs in their relationships, even those always-over-the-moon influencers. However, you will never hear about it on their TikTok or Insta posts.
- Cheating and Transparency Issues
Social media has made it so much easier to reach people all over the world, which is a blessing and a curse at the same time.
Social media cheating statistics will definitely shock you: one in ten spouses confessed that they have messages and content they hide from their partner. Moreover, 47% of spouses who use Facebook have admitted that they cheated on their spouses emotionally online at least once. And finally, lawyers claim that one of the most frequent reasons for divorce is online cheating.
Online cheating is a tricky thing since, sometimes, it is hard to say whether some action can be regarded as a case of infidelity. But still, even the fact that your spouse has left a couple of praising comments under other ladies’ photos on Facebook may ruin even the strongest bond. Yes, these are the photos that cause divorce.
And, of course, seeing one’s spouse constantly being on the phone, refusing to show who they are talking to, and hiding their smartphones causes transparency issues that harm the marriage, even if no form of cheating occurred.
- Addiction
Unfortunately, addiction and divorce are two interrelated notions. However, when we hear about someone divorcing a spouse with an addiction, we most likely think that they are divorcing a drug addict or an alcoholic. Nevertheless, people often underestimate the role of social media platforms, and this blissful ignorance may lead to rather serious consequences. Researchers from the University of Michigan have come up with worrisome statistics – more than 200 million people across the world suffer from social media addiction.
If you suspect that your marriage is being ruined because of your spouse’s addiction to social media, it’s time to act. First, you should have a serious conversation with your spouse. However, do not be too tough and do not blame or abash them. If your spouse manages to recognize their problem, you are on the right path to success!
If you read this article and realize that it’s you whose love for social media networks has gone too far, you should take measures to get rid of it as soon as possible. After all, not letting social media networks turn our lives into one more Black Mirror episode is the best thing we can do for our relationships and mental health.
- Gambling
It may seem surprising, but social media platforms often trigger gambling behavior, which may be difficult to stop. Indeed, Facebook, for example, offers absolutely free social casino games with gambling themes that definitely have an addictive effect on players. It’s not difficult to assume that they facilitate the transition to real-life addictive gambling involving considerable sums of money.
In addition, The Guardian reveals a shocking fact about social media platforms using gambling techniques to evoke psychological cravings and make their users dependent on their platforms. As a result, society gets another case of addiction and divorce interrelatedness.
One of the worst gambling addiction effects on the spouse, as well as their partner and kids, is that the addicted party cannot help but start spending lots of family money on this adverse habit[M1] . The figures can be really shocking, and one can only imagine the financial toll it has on thousands of families. Depleted family budgets and lies gamblers tell to find excuses for their addiction are very bright signs of an inevitable divorce.
So, if you see that your wife’s or husband’s gambling addiction is getting out of hand, do not underestimate the toll it may take on your marriage if both of you do not handle it effectively.
Surely, we have no intention to claim that social media is bad. If you are causally scrolling your Facebook or Instagram feed or checking on your favorite influencer from time to time, it’s totally fine! However, do not forget that social media networks are able not only to entertain but also harm your mental health and relationships. So, to avoid their detrimental effect, remember that everything is good in moderation.
What Not to Post on Social Media During a Divorce
Divorce is an extremely complicated process, and it’s important not to aggravate the situation by posting inappropriate things on your social media accounts.
Many marriage dissolution experts would advise you to stop posting anything at all, but if you find it’s impossible at this point in your life, just be careful and get acquainted with this list of things you’d better not talk about on social media during divorce:
- Overly Intimate Details about Your Relationships
You may be extremely vulnerable and feel resentment during this difficult stage of your life, but being overemotional and going public can harm your reputation. You are sure to have lots of friends, colleagues, and relatives among your contacts, so keeping the details private is an essential thing if you want to have a more or less painless divorce.
The problem is that the Internet algorithms remember everything, so try not to mention what you hate about your spouse or share the details that led to your divorce to avoid reputational damage or problems with the other party’s lawyer.
- News about Your Divorce before It Actually Happens
The news about divorce is rarely a pleasant thing people would like to hear from their loved ones, especially online. Moreover, sometimes the couples decide to reconcile while the divorce is not yet finalized, so not disclosing this fact until the logical end is a must in order to prevent confusion or conversations you would like to avoid.
Besides, by not posting about your divorce, you secure not only your own right to privacy but also that of your spouse and kids. If you feel the need to share the news with someone, it’s better to do it in person but not by announcing divorce on Facebook.
- Your New Relationships
You may wonderwhy you shouldn’t post your relationship on social media. In fact, in states like Texas or Mississippi, it may affect the divorce outcomes greatly since the fact that you are dating someone else may be recognized as adultery and affect the judge’s decisions on child custody or alimony.
If you are happy in new relationships, consider sharing the big news on your accounts only after your marriage dissolution is finalized.
- Big Parties or Nights out
The sad truth is that everything you do may be used against you during divorce. Even if you have decided to relax and forget about your problems by going to the club (which is totally ok), it is best not to make any social media posts on that evening and ask your friends to do the same.
The problem is that these photos or videos may be later displayed in court and lead to some quite unpleasant consequences.
- Derogatory Posts or Comments about Your Spouse
You definitely have a right to feel negative emotions towards your partner and everything that has happened between you. However, since US laws prohibit maligning the spouse, you may face defamation charges if the other party sees those posts.
Moreover, if you have kids, negative posts about your partner may influence the judge’s decision on child custody since they may consider such content as an indicator of your unwillingness to cooperate with the co-parent. If you feel that your resentment does not let you be, have a private conversation with people you trust or your therapist.
- Your Opinions about the Divorce Process
The advice you would definitely receive from your lawyer is: “Do not post about divorce actions and any details related to them.” And, of course, never criticize the decisions of the judge, your spouse’s lawyer, or other experts involved in the case. Your personal opinion surely has the right to exist, but keep it private in order not to face serious legal consequences.
- Your Recent Valuable Purchases
Keeping silent about such issues is especially important if you are seeking alimony. Your posts about the new car or an expensive designer bag will give your spouse grounds to claim that you are financially independent enough not to receive any support, even if it’s not true. So, in order to avoid possible complications during the court proceedings, it would be better to keep your financial situation private.